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Letter "D" » Dave Barry Quotes
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«Karate is a form of martial arts in which people who have had years and years of training can, using only their hands and feet, make some of the worst movies in the history of the world.»
Author: Dave Barry
(Humorist, Writer)
| About:
Movies,
Sports
| Keywords:
Bad art, Bad movie, history of art, History of the, History of the world, karate, Martial, movies
«Your modern teenager is not about to listen to advice from an old person, defined as a person who remembers when there was no Velcro.»
Author: Dave Barry
(Humorist, Writer)
| About:
Funny,
Teenage
| Keywords:
old person, remembers, teenager, Velcro
«Talking about golf is always boring. (Playing golf can be interesting, but not the part where you try to hit the little ball; only the part where you drive the cart.)»
«Software is usually accompanied by documentation in the form of big fat scary manuals that nobody ever reads. In fact, for the past five years most of the manuals shipped with software products have actually been copies of Stephen King's The Stand with new covers pasted on.»
Author: Dave Barry
(Humorist, Writer)
| About:
Software
| Keywords:
accompanied, copies, covers, documentation, manuals, paste, pasted, products, reads, scary, shipped, software, The Manual, The Stand
«The problem with winter sports is that - follow me closely here - they generally take place in winter.»
«Violence and smut are of course everywhere on the airwaves. You cannot turn on your television without seeing them, although sometimes you have to hunt around.»
«Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants, today it's open to anybody who owns hideous clothing.»
Author: Dave Barry
(Humorist, Writer)
| About:
Golf,
Sports
| Keywords:
clothing, hideous, open to, originally, overweight, owns, Protestants, restrict, restricted, restricting, restricts, wealthy
«I am a world-class weenie when it comes to letting people stick needles into me. My subconscious mind firmly believes that if God had wanted us to have direct access to our bloodstreams, He would have equipped our skin with small, clearly marked doors.»
Author: Dave Barry
(Humorist, Writer)
| About:
Funny
| Keywords:
access, equipped, firmly, marked, needles, subconscious, subconscious mind, weenie, weenies
«The leading cause of death among fashion models is falling through street grates.»
«Another possible source of guidance for teenagers is television, but television's message has always been that the need for truth, wisdom and world peace pales by comparison with the need for a toothpaste that offers whiter teeth and fresher breath.»
Author: Dave Barry
(Humorist, Writer)
| About:
Teenage,
Television
| Keywords:
comparison, comparisons, fresher, guidance, message, offers, pales, peace offering, teenagers, toothpaste, whiter
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